I'm Going Off the Rails

I like to imagine IVF cycles as a crazy train, complete with theme song by the great Ozz-Man. It's about that time to board again. The lyrics of "Crazy Train" are strangely applicable. Here's my version:


All aboooooard! (Ha ha ha ha!)

Crazy, but that's how it goes
Millions of people living infertiiiiile
Maybe it's not too late
To learn how to love the way we pro-create

Injection wounds not healing
My ute's a bitter shame
I'm goin' off the rails of a crazy train

I've listened to doctors, I've listened to fools
I've listened to hippies, acupuncture is cool
Pre-existing conditions, insurance says, "No"
Morning appointments with le cam de dildo

Injection wounds not healing
My ute's a bitter shame
I'm goin' off the rails of a crazy train


Just in case you have no idea what I'm parodying:




Oh! Ozzy has one more thing he'd like to show you!